In kendo there is a term Shikai. This relates to four sicknesses of the mind that can crop up during Keiko;

Kyo: Surprise
Ku: Fear
Gi: Doubt
Waku: Confusion

As mentioned in previous post, I have been giving more effort in every keiko session recently, and I felt it was starting to pay off. I was confident in my attacks, and starting to feel like my effort was paying off....

I was scoring more ippon in keiko, mostly shikake waza, especially men. And I was starting to feel like I had a little more control over my opponents, so I decided my next keiko would be one where I would try to use the control to create opportunities for Debanna waza and other Oji waza.

When I came up against one of my Sempai, I was expecting his usual style, lots of pressure with efforts to make mind contact, I thought this could be a good opportunity to practice my own seme and watch his, but no... he changed his keiko and just destroyed me with 3 seme men....

I was totally surprised, and then the four sicknesses had me, for the last two weeks I have reverted by to my old self, waiting, not attacking, fear of opponents attacks....

So, I realise, of course, I need more practice! But also, I need to learn to be flexible, and change in an instant based on my opponent.

I now absolutely must not let it set in. I cannot afford to spend the next few weeks over coming a confidence crisis. So I wont!

I cant go into jigeiko worrying about losing or being hit, to break through, I must attack, try out waza, and seme, attack with Sutemi, and analyse the outcome after keiko!